To Shoot Oneself in the Foot

This phrase has intrigued me for quite some time. Though, initially, it was quite obvious in its meaning - to act against one's own interest or to foolishly harm one's own cause...effectively a person screwing himself/herself. However, there was something not right...a kind of lingering "this-doesn't-feel-entirely-right" feel to what the phrase meant. My computer science oriented brain somehow tried hard to decipher the logic behind the statement and I have a case to argue against this phrase referring to what it currently does.
Consider this - if you are going to shoot yourself in your foot, it obviously means that the initial premise is of you having a gun at hand. Fine. The next thing we need to consider is that we are not attempting to commit suicide, because if we were, we wouldn't be shooting ourselves in our foot. Now we know the world is not short of dumb people, and in the rare case that someone tried to commit suicide by shooting {him/her}self in the foot, they at least didn't die, which is a positive*.
There is another possibility - of you having accidentally shot yourself. In this case, we can safely assume that having a gun at hand, there was always the possibility of it going off. So, even though a person with no gunshot wound on his body is supposed to be better off than someone with his foot shot, we will remove the comfort of no gunshot wound because of the former reasoning. Now that we have reconciled to the fact that there is a high possibility of us having a gunshot wound (if we have a gun in hand), I really cannot think of many better places than the leg for taking the shot. I mean, your head is a bad place for you to get shot...ditto for your heart or abdomen. Getting shot in the face will definitely be fatal - either to your life or your appearance, so it's a no-no there. The stomach too, I am told, is not a very convenient place. That leaves us with the arms and legs, broadly speaking. Since (I think) we use our arms, on an average, for more duration and more purposes than our legs, getting shot in the arms is not a better option. Which leaves us with the legs. Now, if you consider the legs, it is highly unlikely for us to shoot ourselves in our thighs because of the ergonomics of the gun in our hand. A gunshot wound in the knee is bound to have relatively serious medical implications, hence that too, is ruled out. Which effectively means we have just the foot. And hey, it isn't that bad to limp and walk. On the contrary, we might get a couple of compassionate glances from the other sex - a guy limping might be mistaken for a war hero (for some reason, most war heroes in cinema limp), a girl limping will always be offered ready help (remember Vivek's gospel in Minnale about a girl falling down and guys rushing to help?).
Hence, I safely conclude that getting shot in the foot is actually not that bad a thing to happen.
So, the next time you had a close shave with something because of something you did, you'll know you just shot yourself in the foot.

*Note: The underlying assumption in this article is that death is bad. If you don't believe in that, I suggest you read some of my other posts. Ah well, you've read this one anyway.

Quasi-Philosophical Musings

When we are crippled, we use the crutch to support us. With the crutch's support, we slowly regain our balance and strength to walk. Then, once we are fully fit and don't need the crutch any more, we throw it away.
Are we being ungrateful to the crutch in not using it any more? Or are we repaying the crutch back in kind by fulfilling the very purpose of the crutch in enabling us to walk straight and properly?

PS: I was prompted to write this bit after reading about some people suggesting that the BJP should dissociate itself from the RSS, though the analogy is not entirely relevant.

A Son Rises...

No, it definitely is not Ra(h)ul Gandhi. And no, not M.K.Azh(ukku)agiri too, though you're warming up.
For the uninitiated, the next beacon of light in the Tamil cine industry illuminated us with this remarkable masterpiece. Yes yes, he directly challenged Kamal with his first foray into the cine world.
And now, he will be hobnobbing with the likes of Milind Deora, Jyotiraditya Scindia & Co in Sansad Bhawan. Oh yes, and of course, our very own Azhagiri.
Trivia: Remember the Tirumangalam by-election fiasco? Yes, though we did see another "rising son" distributing money, little did we know that the bulk of the task was being carried out by our man, JK Ritheesh. And boy, how assiduously he carried out the task of discreetly dishing out the green lady - 2 rolls of Rs. 500 bills rolled like refills and encased in a ball-point pen and given to people in the name of spreading literacy. (Ok, that literacy bit was my creativity, but the money rolled in pens is apparently how the money distribution happened). Apparently, MaaKi...sorry, Muka and his son promised our dear man an MP seat if he managed to be successful in "securing" the seat in the by-election. Secure he did, and now, the Lok Sabha beckons.
Sivakumar aka JK Ritheesh has arrived. Big time.
How my heart is filled with pride to see such eminent representatives from Tamil Nadu!
Thank you, God.

The BJP's Star Campaigner Gandhi

This article is a classic example of an intelligent person writing unintelligent stuff. That Ra(h)ul Baba has been a more effective campaigner for the BJP than his cousin has been proven in cases like the Gujarat and Karnataka assembly elections, we await to see if he can repeat his feat in the Lok Sabha elections too. Whatever be it, the best thing about the article was this comment -
"
Lionel Said:
Why does Livemint bother printing such blather? Were Ramanathan to stop and think he would not have wasted his time writing an open letter to a closed mind - assuming that the imbecilic scion of the Nehru family has a mind. It is an insult to millions of bright, hardworking and free thinking Indians that this half wit who got into St. Stephens on a dodgy sports scholarship, shoe-horned into Harvard (for 3 months) with help from his father's buddies, could not finish college in lowly Rollins College in Florida and then lied outright about a degree from Cambridge lays claims to be their leader. Please send him packing to a fishing village in Genoa where he can while away his time with wine and pasta as he traces the other half of his moronic genealogy.

Posted On 5/8/2009 5:56:54 PM

"
I don't think anyone else could have captured Rahul Baba's life story in a more concise and apt fashion.
Piss: Will anyone blame me if I say that this guy's comments have traces of this?
;-)

Meaningful Customer Service

"Room pottu yosippaangalo?" :-?

L.A. Confidential and Kim Basinger

I must admit, truthfully, without any apprehensions of creating a good-boy image of myself, that I am generally not turned by hotness and glamour. If it's physical beauty, I go for facial beauty than structural beauty. Oh of course, there are times when the testosterone in me does feel the need for hot women, but those times are few, and necessitated more by need than want. But anyways, I don't think you need be a "male" (the Bajaj Pulsar kind) to admire Kim Basinger in L.A.Confidential. The movie is surely a classic, it's bad enough that I caught up with such a classic so late, still, I was swept by Kim Basinger. Well, Lynn Bracken, more like. She oozed class. To me, this is glamour. Rather, should be glamour. *Opinion* Yes, she was half-naked in a few scenes, a lot of them in lingeries, but not one scene was vulgar. I was quite surprised I was admiring her, at the beginnining, I was kind of afraid if I had become yet-another-thol'a-paathu-jollu-vidra-party or something, but I realized she was appealing to my mind rather than my body. But the point is how well her physical appearance gelled with her character. I'm not sure if I would have been as taken by her if she dressed/looked the same in another role. But, to me, this was one of the few times an actress looked stunning, not only for facial beauty (coming to think of it, Kim Basinger isn't exactly "beautiful" like, say a Catherine Zeta Jones or a Madhubala [the old one] or a Meenakshi Seshadri [the beauty]), but her attire plus (most importantly) the way she carried herself. She was classic. She was glamorous without a hint of vulgarity. And to top it, she played a whore! I actually had to suppress a grin thinking of some of our dear actresses in K/B/T{ollywood} who can wear the saree in the most slutty way possible and look vulgar in perfectly elegant churidhars. Well, that's not to say it's bad, but when that's almost the only thing they do in the movie (look slutty, talk retarded and act nonsense), it is bad. But forget that. The movie is worth a second watch solely for her. Oh and many more, of course, for Russell Crowe and Guy Pearce. Since this post is basically about Kim Basinger in L.A.Confidential, I will just give one-liners for the rest of the cast. Russell Crowe looked like he was made just for that role. Guy looks sooo different from Memento, still, he had that irritating feel about him (in the beginning), especially for his uruppadi-thanam. Kevin Spacey had the look of a Superstar. Really.
On the whole, a semma padam.

The Lighter Side in Dark days...

At times like these, though the situation might be grim, you come across some astounding hilarity and see humour in things you haven't before.
Interpreting the above dialogue of Thalaivar -
Assumption: "Kettava" (bad people) will not be put to too much "sodhanai" (trials and tribulations).
If we were ever to wonder if we are "nallava" (good people) or "kettava" (bad people), bad times might be a good time to seek the answer. Why? In accordance with thalaivar's dialogue, during bad times (sodhanai), let's see the brighter side and consider ourselves "nallava" because of the sodhanai.
And what about when in good times? Aah, good question, glad that you asked. That's when we realize God is holding us in His hands. ;-)
(What a God-forsaken opportunist!)